Dismissingavoidant

Dismissing-avoidant, sometimes written as dismissingavoidant, refers to a pattern within adult attachment theory characterized by emotional distance, a high value placed on independence, and a tendency to minimize or suppress emotional needs in close relationships. Individuals with this style often have a positive view of themselves and a negative or distrustful view of others, and they may appear cool, rational, or detached when faced with intimacy. Relationships are often kept at arm’s length, with a preference for self-reliance over reliance on others.

Developmentally, dismissing-avoidant patterns are thought to arise from early caregiving experiences that discouraged dependence or consistent responsiveness. To cope, a child may deactivate attachment needs, rationalize distress, and present a self-sufficient front. In adulthood, this can manifest as reluctance to depend on partners, discomfort with closeness, and difficulty sharing emotions. During conflicts, individuals may withdraw or downplay emotional concerns, which can leave partners feeling unheard.

Assessment and implications: The style is typically evaluated using interviews such as the Adult Attachment Interview or self-report measures that assess avoidance of closeness and anxiety about abandonment. Dismissing-avoidant individuals may experience relationship tension stemming from communication gaps, conflicting expectations, or partners’ requests for greater emotional intimacy. They can function well in many domains, but chronic avoidance can hinder long-term closeness and satisfaction.

Management and prognosis: Therapeutic approaches include attachment-based and emotion-focused therapies that aim to increase emotional awareness, tolerance for closeness, and secure interaction patterns. Interventions often emphasize gradual exposure to vulnerability, naming and processing emotions, and building trust while preserving autonomy. Outcomes vary, but with engagement, some individuals can develop greater relational security without sacrificing independence.