CoDependents

Codependents are individuals who exhibit codependency—an excessive emotional or psychological reliance on another person, often to the detriment of their own needs. The term is commonly applied to relationships in which one person depends on the other for a sense of identity, validation, or stability, and it is frequently discussed in the context of relationships involving addiction or mental health issues, though it can occur in other settings.

Common traits include difficulty setting boundaries, people-pleasing, sacrificing personal needs, seeking constant approval, low self-esteem, fear of abandonment, caretaking that becomes controlling, and denial of problems or enmeshment with others’ lives. Codependent patterns can develop as coping strategies in response to dysfunctional family dynamics or persistent caregiving roles.

Causes and context often involve early family experiences where love or safety was contingent on meeting others’ needs, learned patterns of caretaking, and enabling behaviors in relationships. These backgrounds can foster a belief that one’s value depends on helping others and maintaining harmony, sometimes at the expense of one’s own well-being.

Effects may include emotional distress, burnout, strained or unbalanced relationships, and poor self-care. Over time, codependency can perpetuate cycles of dependency and, in some cases, enable problematic behaviors in others.

Treatment and management typically involve therapy—individually or with family—as well as educational resources. Programs such as Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA) offer peer support. Emphasis is placed on boundaries, assertiveness, self-care, and increasing autonomy. Recovery is ongoing and aims to establish healthier relationship patterns rather than assign blame.

Criticism and nuance note that codependency is a contested term in some circles; it is not a formal DSM diagnosis in many contexts, and some argue it risks pathologizing caring or engaging behavior. Cultural variations and individual differences also influence how the concept is understood.