spiegeling

Spiegeling is a Dutch term for the practice of mirroring in communication, psychotherapy, and education. Derived from spiegel, meaning “mirror,” the concept refers to reflecting another person’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors back to them in order to foster understanding and connection.

In psychotherapy and counseling, spiegeling is a deliberate technique of reflective listening. The practitioner validates feelings by restating content and affect, paraphrasing, and aligning tone and pace. The goal is to increase empathic accuracy, encourage elaboration, and support the client’s self‑exploration, while avoiding judgment or distortion of the client’s perspective.

In everyday interaction and training contexts, spiegeling includes both verbal mirroring (paraphrase, echoing keywords) and nonverbal mirroring (posture, gestures, voice tempo). When used skillfully, it can build rapport and facilitate communication; when overdone or perceived as inauthentic, it can feel manipulative or paternalistic.

Researchers connect mirroring to empathic resonance and social bonding, with reference to the mirror neuron system as a possible neurophysiological basis. However, reception of spiegeling is influenced by cultural norms, individual preferences, and context. Ethical use requires accuracy, consent, and sensitivity to power dynamics; inappropriate mirroring may undermine trust or harm the therapeutic or interpersonal relationship. See also mirroring, reflective listening, and the mirror neuron concept.