lifepositions

Lifepositions are a term from transactional analysis (TA). They describe fundamental beliefs about self and others that guide behavior and communication. Developed by psychiatrist Eric Berne in the 1950s, lifepositions are sometimes called life positions or psychological stances. They reflect early life messages and are related to an individual's life script.

There are four primary lifepositions:

- I'm OK, You're OK: a healthy stance of equality and mutual respect; allows cooperative interactions.

- I'm OK, You're not OK: a stance of superiority or dominance; can justify controlling others.

- I'm not OK, You're OK: a stance of inferiority, dependence, or self-doubt; seeks approval.

- I'm not OK, You're not OK: a negative or despairing stance; withdrawal, surrender.

These positions are not fixed; people may revert to different positions across contexts or as defense mechanisms. They influence how people interpret others' behavior, how they respond in transactions, and which "games" they may play in relationships. Lifepositions are learned in childhood from parental messages, authority figures, culture, and experiences, and are reinforced by scripts that guide ongoing behavior.

Therapeutically, TA aims to identify an individual's current lifeposition, understand its origins, and promote more functional stances, typically by moving toward I'm OK, You're OK. Techniques include analyzing transactions, recognizing games, and re-framing beliefs to support autonomy and mutual respect. Critiques note that lifepositions may oversimplify complex social realities and can be culturally contingent; nevertheless, they remain a central heuristic in TA for exploring self-perception and interpersonal dynamics.