theythem

They/them are pronouns used to refer to a person without specifying gender, or to refer to a person who identifies as nonbinary. They function as the subject (they), object (them), possessive determiner (their), possessive pronoun (theirs), and reflexive (themselves). The singular they has historical roots in English dating to the 14th century and was commonly used when the gender of a person was unknown. In recent decades it has been widely adopted as a gender-neutral option by nonbinary people and by others who prefer not to specify gender.

In contemporary usage, individuals may declare their pronouns or have them indicated in introductions, profiles, or records. Writers and editors use they/them to refer to such persons, and many institutions encourage pronoun sharing to improve inclusivity and reduce misgendering.

Grammar and style: The singular they takes verb agreement compatible with plural they: they are, they have. It can appear in formal and informal contexts. Major style guides such as the APA, MLA, and Chicago Manual of Style recognize or endorse the singular they as acceptable for inclusive writing; some older authorities previously advised avoiding it.

Etiquette and usage considerations: when you know a person’s pronouns, use them consistently; if you misgender someone, apologize briefly and correct yourself. If you do not know someone’s pronouns, use their name or neutral terms until you are informed. Respect for pronouns is a common standard in many workplaces, schools, and media outlets, and proactive pronoun sharing is encouraged in many settings.

Related terms: nonbinary, gender-neutral pronouns, and neopronouns. The use of singular they continues to evolve as understandings of gender and identity develop. See also: pronoun.